Central Cee owes me £135.00



So the other day my son goes ‘Mum, can I talk to you please’ (he’s so polite). I’m like ‘Ye, what you saying’ (because why are you being so formal lmfao). He goes ‘I want to ask you for something, something for my birthday. It’s the only thing I want, I don’t want anything else’. 


My head did spring up I can’t lie. My child doesn’t ask for ANYTHING. As in I’m constantly like ‘Lij do you want this, do you want that’ and he’s like ‘No, thank you’. To the point I’m like MY GUY, YOU’RE NINE YEARS OLD. THERE MUST BE THINGS YOU WANT. And I buy him things, cause I feel like he should have things, but it just gets put in his box and stays there. So I’m mad curious to find out now what he actually wants. And I’m bracing myself for the big ting. 


He’s not a complicated lad to be honest, he likes what he likes… Roblox, his PS5, going to Youth Club, Football, Swimming & Grandma (not in that order though, Grandma is his thing he likes most in the world). 


Anyway I said ‘Cool what is it’. He goes ‘Can I get a Nike Tech Fleece’. 


LMFAOOOOO. I’m like WHAT!?!!? LMFAO, sure kid, like what hahahaha of all the things you want, issa Nike. Tech. Fleece. So I’ve said ‘Yes, you can, but it’s May, you don’t have to wait until December for it, I’ll get you a Nike Tech Fleece TODAYYYY, NOWWWWWW, in fact, I’ll get you two!’. He is ecstatic right, jumps up and down and does a little dance (that I think he learned on Tik Tok, but he doesn’t have Tik Tok so this is a story for another day because which one of you are showing my son Tik Tok?). 


So a week goes by, and every time I remember to order the fleece he’s at school, finally I ask him which colour, he says ‘wait let me show you’. He goes on YouTube, types in Central Cee - Nike Tech, finds a video someone has made of Central Cee in all the different colours, and stops on a blue one. 


I’m like cool! the next day I’m with Gabi. Gabi is an EA (an exceptional one) I booked her in for four days to coordinate my life for me last week. She goes to order the tech, we come to find IT IS SEVENTY GREAT BRITISH POUNDS for the top and SIXTY FIVE GREAT BRITISH POUNDS for the bottoms. 




MY GUY, WE ARE IN A RECESSION (I think) THE COST OF LIVING IS CRAZY (this is fact) YOU ARE NINE YEARS OLD. This is £135 WORTH OF GARMS. And I said I would get TWO. BRUDDAH?!  


Anyway, they didn’t have the colour he wanted, so I got him a next colour. It arrived yesterday and I just came to say: 


- CENTRAL CEE YOU OWE ME 135 GREAT BRITISH POUNDS. YOU WILL PAY FOR YOUR CRIMES


- WHOEVER IS LETTING LIJ GO ON TIK TOK, STOP 


I asked him to try it on for size, and the poses he did really just sent me. This head down hood up ting, then the head back, hands clasped ting. I dunno man, I dunno. 


😍😍😍😍


But he’s so cute, and it’s SUCH a nice colour on him, and he is sooo soooo happy he got his Nike Tech, so let me mind my business. 


xxx


Fun fact: We were in Bicester December 2022 and Lij’s (older) friend was like ‘OH MY GOD THERE’S CENTRAL CEE’ and he RAN over to Central for a photo. Elijah went with him. Central took the photo and then said to Elijah ‘Do you want one too’ and Elijah said ‘Sorry no, my mum said I’m not allowed to talk to strangers’. 


HAAHJDFGHKJGFDSLASDKFJG


In 2025 I want you to know, Lij is SO PISSED he never took that photo. He loves Central Cee & he talks about it all the time odskfjgfdsadfkgjfdl 


So ye I owe the kid a photo with Central Cee, lord knows how I’m gonna pull that off. 


To be continued… 



 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

An Insert.

Okay before I even get into the next chapter, a very particular point has been made to me about this. So I’ll do the disclaimer early on so that we’re all clear.   My story isn’t about Vengeance, it is about Testimony. Vengeance is about repaying harm, Testimony is about releasing truth.   When God says “Vengeance is mine” in Romans 12:19, he is talking about retaliation - the desire to punish, destroy or ‘get even’. Vengeance is rooted in control and in payback.   Telling the truth about what happened to you is not the same thing.   The Bible supports and encourages truth telling and testimony. It repeatedly affirms it furthermore.   Truth brings freedom “You wil know the truth, and the truth will set you free” - John 8:32 Darkness is exposed by light “Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them” - Ephesians 5:11 The list goes on. Silence is never commanded to protect wrongdoing, that’s not how this works. And as long as you...
Read more

Chapter 1

Image
  “He’s getting married!!” She blurted out across the table. I’m only half listening, because why hasn’t he text me or called?  “They came over and asked him if he was single, and told him he’s my type. He smiled but said he’s actually engaged”. She holds her hand to her head feigning embarrassment. “So I’m apologising for them saying this, especially the part about being my type, and he looks me dead in the face and goes… ‘but you are’… She’s all animated, fake dropping her jaw to the floor, eyes wide, with the can-you-fucking-believe-this-guy expression, waiting for me to match her energy.  Of course I can fucking believe the guy, he’s a guy, they’re all very clearly just eurghhhhhh…; Jesus, why hasn’t he text or called?? I’m tapping my phone screen, for the 180th time this morning, as though my phone maybe forgot to notify me that he’s text. As though my watch forgot to do its little vibrating dance thingy it does on my wrist, when he’s text..  When he’s text.. Go...
Read more